Dating is now an ancient art. Asking a member of the
opposite gender out on a formal date is a millennial dilemma, as it is much easier
to simply invite someone to hang out. Why is hanging out so much better then
dating? Well, for one thing, it can be much less stressful. There are no
pressures of commitments to dress or act a certain way, and the participators
can leave at any time they please. It also might help you get to know your
significant other on a different level then dating, as you see them in a more
casual light, among their family and friends and doing ordinary tasks. But with
all the benefits ‘hanging out’ provide, along with how easy it is to instigate,
it can have some pretty serious effects on romantic relationships.
Let’s take the first aspect of hanging out- the casualness
of both the invitation and the actual act itself. Asking someone to hangout is
an extremely vague invitation, both in the relationship and the activity. Excessive
amounts of hanging out, especially successively, can cause relationships to
lose their formality. This creates an environment where couples aren’t thinking
or talking together about making serious relationship choices, such as the
decision to become exclusive or become engaged. Our society is now simply
sliding into relationships instead of firmly deciding. This can lead to
communication problems between couples, confusion, and misguided decisions. When
compared to dating, where someone directly asks another, and the couple has a
distinct plan on what activity will be taking place, the difference in
communication skills is clear. A date is a planned activity completely focused
on enjoying your partner and getting to know them better. Hanging out is a
subjective interaction where both participants are merely trying to escape
boredom. Which one seems to better prepare a couple for marriage? The answer is
clear.
The unclear time limits on hanging out sessions can also
have adverse effects on relationships. A casual hangout session can last much
longer then a planned date, and couples that hangout tend to do so often,
almost every day. Spending too much time around someone can cause a distinct illusion
of familiarity, or in other words, it can cause a couple to think they know
each other better than they actually might. A couple spending too much time together
can have almost the same effects as couples that engage in too much physical
touch. It impairs judgment, and the pseudo-familiarity can cause couples to
trust each other much faster in a relationship, and at higher amounts. This can
again lead to improper decisions about commitment and, when these fall through,
trust issues.
If most couples had their way, they would be around each
other all the time. This makes sense, and it seems like it would assist in
their marriage preparation, but, marriage requires both persons to create time to spend with the other,
similar to a date. This is why good dating leads to good marriages, because
both individuals develop a habit of making time for their significant other. Seeing
each other less often can make dating that much more special and romantic. It
is important for couples to be around each other with intention and purpose. Also,
who says no to a fun date? It’s better then hanging out anyway.
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